The Christmas that Santa Chomped Away at Jack's House

As usual, every year, Jack left a carrot for the reindeer,

And for Santa, a bottle of beer....

Santa hoped he wouldn't be late ....

As he munched the mince pies left on a plate !

A trail of crumbs led to the door....

Santa's mouth watered, he wanted more....

He made his was to the refrigerator,

Decided he'd leave the gifts to be delivered later....

As he opened the door, the light shone on the floor....

Inside were lots of tasty treats galore....

First, he nibbled on some cheese,

With salt 'n' pepper that made him sneeze...

A ham roll, some turkey whole, a

A little bit of sherry, Santa stole ! Even sugar lumps from the bowl !

All of the gin, made Santa grin,

He took another glass with ice and lemon in !

He stepped off the step for a breath of fresh air,

And kicked the bottle of milk standing there ...

CRASH ! BANG ! WHALLOP ! What a din !

The milk bottle smashed and into the kitchen, milk poured in....

The others at home, stirred and woke up...

When the cat saw the milk, she purred, licking some up !

She wagged her tail and hit the plate of mince pies,

Which crumbled and fell, with one of her cries...

"What's all the noise ?" Jack's Mum grumbled,

As another of the mince pies off the table tumbled !

Santa bumbling, said he was sorry ...

That he'd "Clean up the mess, in a hurry, don't worry